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You know how people talk about how much you change in your twenties? And when you’re 20 or 22, you just can’t bring yourself to believe them. After all, you’re a “grown up” now, so how could you change anymore?
Truthfully, for me, I was at a particularly low point in my early twenties, and would have welcomed any sort of changing into a different person.
But the change and attitude shift does happen over time. It’s so gradual that you really don’t notice it until one day when you’re in your late 20s and suddenly you realize you really don’t care what people think of you. I mean, you obviously don’t want to get arrested, fired, or disappoint your parents (or at least I don’t). But in general, who cares? The constant worrying just kind of disappears.
Old Navy Boat-Neck Tee
Aeo Jegging
Everlane Loafer Mule
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Old Navy Boat-Neck Tee
Aeo Jegging
Everlane Loafer Mule
When it happened for me, something else seemed to happen. When constant worrying disappeared, the ability to stand up for myself started to show up.
I’ve always been introverted and combining that with anxiety, standing up for myself just seemed…difficult. But after a few situations in the last year or so, I’ve realized I’m much better at standing up for myself.
I thought I would share how I’ve been standing up for myself and what I’ve been doing to stand up for myself.
1. Gone to customer service when there’s a problem
Do you know how many people don’t do this? I know there’s a variety of reasons for not doing so, most of which are not wanting to deal with “incoherent customer service agents.” Now, as someone who has worked on the other end of that customer service call, I can tell you that that’s typically not the case. In fact, I could right a whole post about the correct way to deal with customer service. But that’s not the point of this.
The point is that when I went to make the call to Verizon (my sworn enemy, if you’ve read my twitter), I told myself ahead of time that I was not going to let myself be pushed around. I knew exactly what was wrong with my wifi was and what I needed them to do. And that was exactly what I told them when they answered. There was a little back and forth because they needed to run some tests, but that was fine. In the end, I got almost exactly what I asked for. (I asked for them to come on Friday, but they could only make it a day later on Saturday.) It was amazing to feel like I had finally stood up to the beast was that is Verizon and won.
2. Stopped letting people tell me that I’m wrong (when I know I’m not)
Oof. This one is a sore spot. It’s also pretty self explanatory. I try as often as possible to follow the Disney customer service motto of “the customer is not always right, but we’ll let them be wrong with dignity.” But man, it’s really hard to do that when it’s a guy just being a jackass about it. In some cases, you really just have to tell him that he’s wrong.
3. Stopped letting people (literally) push me around.
Again, I mean this both metaphorically and literally. Have you ridden the metro in DC and then tried to get off of it in DC? I’m so sick of people pushing me around or thinking I should get out of their way because I’m a small girl and they’re a man. Enough. I’m standing up for myself and walking tall and proud.
Photos by Kimberly Graydon
